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There is a lot of talk out of Republican Party circles about the left and its plots to take away our freedoms, such as our guns. However, this is a lie. The left has been dead for decades. There are no popular parties of communists and socialists. Sure, there are a few remaining members of these old parties, but they are hardly a threat to the status quo. Most of them may be FBI informants anyway.

Nowadays, the left is the old political right on bread and butter issues, the environment, and much more. Remember President Richard Nixon? Over forty years ago he was a hard-line conservative who hated communism but made peace with China, ended the war in Vietnam by withdrawing all US troops, signed legislation creating the Environmental Protection Agency, and offered a public option on national health care which was rejected by the Democrats. Nowadays Nixon would be considered politically far to the left. He would be a big letter “COMMUNIST!”

So when we hear talk about the left from say, Fox News, especially on economics and politics, those folks really mean the 99 percent. That’s right! They mean us! In poll after poll the 99 percent want a $15 minimum wage, higher taxes on the rich, an end to free trade agreements that are designed to export millions of US jobs but which benefits the 1 percent almost exclusively, Medicare for all, greater worker and environmental protections, legislation that will strengthen labor unions, and a lot more stuff that would be in interest of the 99 percent, but which would not necessarily be in the interests of the billionaires who control your government, both major political parties, and all of the major news media that keep you blinded to the things the billionaires don’t want you to know about.

So when you hear somebody on television talking about how the left is out to steal your freedoms, like a powerful gang of communists, that really is not true. These groups don’t exist in any serious way. That somebody on television is really out to steal your freedoms by distracting you from the real economic bread and butter issues by focusing your attention on the social issues. That person on the news is a paid employee of the billionaires on the political right. That person has little credibility.

By today’s political right standards, even old arch-conservative Richard Nixon would be a hard-line communist. Nixon was, of course, also a crook who resigned under the very real threat of impeachment. Nowadays, the political servants of the 1 percent can commit all sorts of crimes and get away with it, like torture, waging wars against humanity, and on and on.

Oh my! How things have changed.

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Dear Editor,

I don’t think anybody has clearly defined the political “right” versus “left” in the United States. So I’ll give it a try.

The “right” hates Elizabeth Warren because she stands up for the middle class. Apparently, if you’re on the “right” you support the one percent and if you’re a lefty you support the 99 percent. So the political “right” is very far to the right, while the political “left” is everybody else that makes up the vast majority.

If you’re on the right, you devoutly believe in the gospel according to Fox News; that Obama is a Muslim terrorist in disguise, that he hates the US, that Democrats worship Satan, and that the favorite drink of all Democrats is the fresh blood of bible reading children of the “right.” If you’re on the left, you believe in the bible according to Jesus, about loving thy neighbor, feeding the poor, turning the other cheek and things like that. If you’re on the right, anybody who believes in that stuff is “an unmanly pussy.”

If you’re on the left, you believe that going to war requires a vote of congress, like it says in the Constitution; if you’re on the right, the only requirement for a president who sends troops off to an illegal, but profitable, war only requires that he be a republican.

If you’re on the right, you believe that corporations are people too good to be drafted into the army; on the left you’re mystified how the Koch Brothers wing of the supreme court could decide that corporations are people with constitutional rights since the word “corporation” is not in the constitution; and one also has to believe that a person needs to breath in order to be a person.

If you’re on the right, you want government to keep its hands off of your Medicare; if you’re on the left, you know that Medicare is a government program.

If you’re on the right, you think all government is bad and anybody who uses government programs like welfare ought to have their lazy ass hanged at the gallows, even as you collect your unemployment insurance. People on the left know that unemployment insurance is a government program.

If you’re on the right, you believe that Obama wasn’t born in the United States and that alone makes him legally ineligible to be president of the United States; if you’re on the left you’ve gone on-line and discovered in less than two minutes from a law library that according to US law, it doesn’t matter where a person was born, that so long as one parent is an American citizen, he or she is a “natural born citizen” and therefore eligible to be president.

If you’re on the left, you laugh when you realize that based upon US law, Obama’s mother could have hooked up with a walrus in Antarctica and their offspring would’ve been a “natural born citizen” and eligible to be president. When presented with this unlikely scenario, people on the right express a deep suspicion that Obama must be hiding his tusks somehow, and that he is secretly a terrorist sympathizing Muslim half-walrus who worships salmon and therefore he is not eligible to be president.

Okay, so I got it. People on the left are more likely to be about twenty IQ points higher than people on the right; the lefties also read a lot and the righties aren’t sure what a book is.

Warmest Regards,

Joseph Hatter

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